Receiving a cancer diagnosis and undergoing treatment is a major adjustment, both physically and emotionally. The body reacts differently depending on the type of cancer and the treatment you receive. The most important thing is that you receive clear and personalized information, so that you know what to expect and how you can get support along the way. If possible, feel free to bring someone you trust to your medical appointments. It can be comforting to have someone with you who listens and supports you.
Changed body
When you go through cancer treatment, not only does a lot happen inside the body, but also on the outside. Many notice that their appearance changes. It can involve losing your hair, gaining or losing weight, getting scars, or losing part of your body after surgery. And suddenly, you may not really recognize yourself in the mirror.
It is common for these changes to evoke strong emotions. For some, it becomes extra clear how much appearance actually matters, especially when everything else in life is also changing. Caring about your appearance when you are ill is nothing strange; it is human. And it is completely okay to feel that way.
Hair loss is one of the most common side effects of chemotherapy. And even though others may say things like “It’s just hair, you’re alive, aren’t you!”, you know that it is not that simple. Hair is often an important part of who you are. Losing it can feel like losing a part of yourself, and for many, it is a difficult threshold to cross when the illness becomes more visible to others. If you are interested in trying some form of hair replacement, such as a wig or something similar, you can talk to your nurse about it. The nurse can write a referral that you can take to a wig maker, for example.
At the same time, others find that it is not at all as emotionally charged, and for some, it can feel like a sign that something is happening and that there is a direction forward. How you feel about hair loss can vary greatly, and that is completely okay. For some, treatment means getting scars, lymphedema, or even having part of the body removed, such as a breast or a testicle. Such changes often affect how you perceive your own body. It is not uncommon to feel estranged from your new self. Perhaps the body no longer feels entirely like yours. It can also affect feelings about closeness, sex, and intimacy. There is a lot to take in, and it is completely normal for it to raise questions, sadness, or frustration.
Some choose to have reconstruction surgery to try to regain a body that feels more like the one they had before the illness. Others feel that they do not want or need to do it. And both choices are equally valid. The most important thing is that you do what feels right for you. It is about feeling whole, in your own way. Whether that means a wig, makeup, tattoos over the scars, or just going out as you are, it is entirely up to you.
You have the right to mourn the changes in your body, even if others think you should be “grateful that you are alive.” One does not exclude the other. You are still you. With or without hair. With or without scars. With or without that part of your body. And you deserve to feel beautiful, safe, and comfortable in your own body, just as you are.